Love,
PJ’s Mom ~ Charity

There are no words for how thankful and grateful I am for your website. To have such careful and practical information compiled in one page helped me through the worst of days of devasting and excruciating pain after my missed miscarriage was diagnosed on January 8, 2010. I would like to share my story as maybe one day it could help someone make a better decision of how to deal with a missed miscarriage.

I was offered four options on that day in week 12 when the ultrasound showed that my baby’s heart had probably stopped beating in week 8 when we had seen it the last time: 1) Wait it out, 2) use medication to induce the miscarriage, 3) have a D&C in the Doctor’s office under local anesthesia, 4) have a D&C in the operating room under general anesthesia. Because I wanted to have genetic testing of the baby’s tissue, options 1) and 2) were out. Also, I had this incredible sense of urgency to resolve the situation as fast as possible that I took the option of a D&C under local anesthesia in the doctor’s office which was available two days later – instead of waiting a few days longer to get the procedure done in the operating room (I admit I am also really afraid of general anesthesia).

It turned out that the two D&C procedures are slightly different (at least in the hospital I was): In the doctor’s office, the suction device used is small and hand-operated, while in the operating room they use an electric device that is much more powerful. Moreover, even though the local anesthesia was quite good, the D&C experience in the doctor’s office was not exactly pleasant and my tension in response to the pain and the weird sensations made it difficult for my doctor to get all the tissue out.

I ended up with leftover tissue and my pregnancy hormones have not dropped below 150 in the seven weeks after the D&C procedure in the doctor’s office. These were seven weeks of depression, frustration, endless blood testing, many phone calls with my doctor, ultrasounds, and therefore constant reminders of the miscarriage. This week I couldn’t take it anymore and had my second D&C, in the operating room under general anesthesia. I can only hope that this is the end of it.

Learning your baby is dead will forever be one of the worst experiences in life and making a good decision in this moment is almost impossible. Nevertheless, resolving the physical side of the miscarriage as smooth and as fast as possible can help to limit one side of the pain as it at least gives the platform to move on. So as an advice, in case you are offered different types of D&Cs, do better than I did, choke up the questions through your tears of what exactly each option means and what the success rates are – I know you don’t really care at that moment, but I can testify, you will care a lot for many weeks after.

Please help me determine if this is “normal” and if I can expect my hormones to go back to “normal” after another period…

Any thoughts and comments would be very helpful, as we’re of course, planning to start trying again soon.

Thank you for all you’ve done for all of us.

Thank you for this website. My husband & I lost our first baby 2 weeks ago. I had light spotting for 5 days, then bright red bleeding on 1/18. I thought I was 8 1/2 weeks, but the ultrasound showed I was measuring 6. They sent me home from the ER with a threatened miscarriage, but my body completed it later that same day. I haven’t had a D&C. The ultrasound also showed some fibroids, which I never realized I had. I have no idea if they caused problems with this pregnancy or if they will cause future problems. I’m still waiting for my hcg levels to drop below 5. Waiting for my body to get back to “normal” feels very frustrating, and I have to constantly remind myself to be patient. I feel like I have so many questions & different feelings, and your site always addresses them — I don’t feel stupid or wrong for feeling the way I do. And of course, I have so many questions. Your site has been a real source of support in a terribly painful time. I visit it frequently and always find what I need. Thank you for all of your kind & compassionate words.

I had D&C on Sept 17th the day i turned 39. I found out at my scan the week before the baby had stopped growing at 8 week. I was devasted as I know I am in my late thirties and I really wanted another child. I am ver thankful to have a beautiful 14 month old little boy whom I love dearly. The after effects of miscarriage are awful but I feel I need to stay positive. I have a quesiton I drink one coffee every morning at work and one cup of tea in the evenings, I rarely eat chocalate the occasional bar and eat healthy. I am freaked out as I keep reading caffeine can cause miscarriage and i cant get this out of my head. I dont smoke and have the occasional glass of wine, am I beating my self up over this as its only 2 weeks since my loss. Thanks eveyone and best of luck to everyone who is trying for a baby again. Caroline mother to Peter Breen 14 months and little angel in heaven.