Causes of Miscarriage

Most early miscarriages (as many as 60% of first trimester ones) will remain unexplained. It is usually assumed these losses are genetic, where the chromosomes simply did not replicate correctly. Many people will assume that something that happened recently, such as an illness, fall, or exposure to something will have caused the miscarriage. This is rarely true, since by the time a miscarriage is diagnosed or begins, the baby has been lost for quite some time. Hopefully this section will help you understand the causes; you should also read the section on myths.
 
There are several categories of miscarriage causes:
Hormones

When we talk about a hormone problem, you have likely miscarried in less than 10 weeks. After that, the placenta has taken over hormone production and any normal deficiency you have is not a factor. Low progesterone, the most common problem, is not as easy to treat as you might hope. Progesterone suppositories, while frequently prescribed, are not proven to be helpful and often actually cause a nonviable pregnancy to last longer than it should.

The only situation where progesterone is a sure solution is with a luteal phase defect, where the corpus luteum, which is formed along with egg at ovulation, does not produce the hormones needed to sustain a pregnancy. For most women, however, this is usually not an every-month problem. Usually the situation rights itself with the next egg and the next corpus luteum. This problem, if it is a permanent one, can be diagnosed through two separate endometrial biopsies. Progesterone must be started 48 hours after ovulation to work. By the time you have missed a period, it is too late to save a pregnancy with a luteal phase defect.5

Low progesterone, however, is usually a symptom of an nonviable pregnancy, and not the cause. Doctors often prescribe progesterone suppositories out of patient pressure when the hormone levels are low, but their use is controversial and usually completely ineffective. A common treatment for a suspected progesterone problem is Clomid, a pill taken for five days early in your cycle to rev up your hormone production. Not everyone is a candidate for Clomid, and 25% of women will have decreased cervical mucus, which can actually make you less fertile. See the Sperm Meets Egg Plan for more information.

Other hormone problems may be created when you have an untreated thyroid disorder. Your thyroid function can easily be tested, and this problem is very treatable.

Chromosome Defects

There are many factors that come in to play when the egg and sperm unite and form that first cell. Even if both the egg and sperm come with perfect chromosomes, the first few cell divisions can see an abnormality crop up that would certainly be devastating. Chromosome defects that cause a newly fertilized egg to die can account for as much as 60 percent of early miscarriages.

You can usually find out if you had a baby with a chromosome problem through testing tissue from the miscarriage. This must be done RIGHT AWAY when the tissue comes out or the cells cannot grow and the test won’t work. If this is your first miscarriage, however, do not go to great lengths to save tissue. Very few doctors will test it, and a chromosomal cause for the miscarriage will be assumed without testing.

Even when you have a D&C and the doctor sends the tissue immediately, the test still might not work. (Mine didn’t.) But if you do find your baby had a chromosome defect, find a small measure of comfort in knowing that although you lost this one precious baby, the chances of it happening again are extremely small. Another threshold will be crossed, however, at age 35. At that point, your eggs will begin to age, and your odds of a chromosomal miscarriage will begin increasing dramatically.

After the 2nd trimester begins, the number of miscarriages caused by genetic factors drops to less than 10 percent.3 If you have had several miscarriages in a row, then your odds of this being your problem are quite low, about 7%.42 

Physical Problem with the Uterus or CervixSome women have a uterus that does not have the usual shape. Others have a cervix that may be weakened by a number of causes, including multiple D&C procedures or their mother taking DES when she was pregnant (although note that DES was discontinued in 1971 and most DES daughters are leaving their childbirth years behind.) Both of these problems can cause early labor, usually during a critical period from 12-24 weeks. This cause is responsible for 12 percent of miscarriages during this time period. As the baby grows, especially during the very rapid growth spurt during this time frame, the irregularly shaped uterus may not be able to expand or the weak cervix may start to open up and let the baby out. There are treatments for both of these that are quite effective—corrective surgery on the uterus and a cervical stitch that holds the cervix closed. This problem WILL REOCCUR if not treated.

A uterine abnormality often causes a miscarriage due to early labor, but it can also cause fetal demise, which is what happened to our Casey. Sixteen weeks into my pregnancy with Emily, we had an abnormal AFP screening. Since we were near the point of the pregnancy when Casey died, naturally we were frantic. We saw a perinatologist, who discovered I had a septate uterus. When I was a fetus, the two sections of tissue that normally fuse together to form the uterus only fused on the bottom. Therefore, there is a huge wall going down the middle of my uterus. When Casey implanted, he chose the middle wall. This section, however, has little blood flow. As Casey grew and required more and more blood and nutrition, this area could not support him. Although Emily chose a better implantation spot, this problem caused her to be breech and required a c-section. While I did have the surgery to correct this problem, my next pregnancy still had complications, and I was not allowed a vaginal delivery.

Be aware that there are varying levels of septums. Some are paper-thin and simply move out of the way for the baby, causing no problems. Others, like mine, increase your chance of miscarriage significantly. Only a high-level sonogram or an HSG dye test can uncover this problem.

Immune Disorders

While many experienced and well respected reproductive endocrinologists specialize in this field now, many “regular” ob/gyn doctors are quite resistant to the idea of this type of miscarriage cause and its treatment. Specialists in immune disorders claim up to an 80% success rate with women who have had three or more miscarriages, but there is still much skepticism even among infertility and reproductive specialists.

Antiphospholipid antibodies can cause blood clots in the placenta that block or slow down the baby’s blood supply, causing growth to slow or the baby to die altogether. Your blood can be tested for these antibodies. These tests are called anticardiolipins or the associated lupus anticoagulant. These are inexpensive tests, and sometimes you can get them after only one miscarriage. If antibody levels are thought to be high enough to affect the pregnancy, treatment involves baby aspirin and sometimes a blood thinner called Heparin. In rare cases, the woman is actually found to have Lupus, which may be mild enough not to affect her, but needs management anyway to protect her pregnancies (see antinuclear antibodies). While a miscarriage due to this problem can happen at any time, often the baby will grow past the first trimester. 10 to 15% of recurring miscarriages are caused by these antibodies.

Antinuclear antibodies are caused by an auto-immune problem, in Lupus or a Lupus-like syndrome, where the body attacks itself. The treatment for this problem is Prednisone, a corticosteroid, which calms down the inflammatory process of auto-immune disease. Prednisone, however, is really a horrible drug and will cause all sorts of terrible side effects, including swelling, bruise marks on the face, and discomfort. You do not ask for this drug without really needing it.6

Fetal-Blocking Antibodies work to protect the baby from the mother’s immune system, which will recognize the father’s genetic material as foreign to her body and attack it. When the sperm penetrate the egg, it provides foreign material, but it also contains histocompatibility locus antigens (HLA). The sperm’s HLA will “talk” to the mother’s HLA, which would normally attack the baby, and stimulate the mother’s body to protect the baby. In some cases, however, the father’s genetic material is too similar to the mother’s. In that case, the mother’s response is weak and insufficient to prevent her white blood cells from attacking the new cells. Standard testing for this is not yet available, and you would have be accepted into one of the few elite clinics working in this field. If your tests show you and your partner’s DNA to be too similar, you can receive injections of your partner’s white blood cells, in hopes of getting enough of his HLA in your system to stimulate a stronger protective response. This is an expensive and controversial tactic, but allegedly (a word I use since there isn’t solid 3rd party data to support it) succeeds 80% of the time.7, 42 This type of problem usually causes an early miscarriage, well before 12 weeks, and is often suspected when several miscarriages have occurred at the exact same time in the pregnancy

The average OB/Gyn may not be up to date on these immune issues. Read up on it yourself and find a specialist who can determine if this is a problem that might be affecting your babies. You are not usually a candidate for the more involved testing, which is expensive and not typically covered by insurance, until you have at least three losses.Premature Rupture of Membranes and Early Labor

Many miscarriages begin with cramping and labor-like symptoms, but true PROM and Early Labor are usually associated with babies that are in the second or third trimester. Early labor can often be treated with drugs that relax the uterus and women are placed on bed rest either at home or in the hospital.

Sometimes, however, the baby comes anyway. This is one of the most traumatic of losses, technically a stillbirth and not a miscarriage after 20 weeks, because you will hold and see your baby and beg him or her to breathe. For some women, the baby will even be born alive, but only live for a few minutes, hours or days. There really is nothing harder in life than this.

PROM is defined as your water breaking prior to 37 weeks, the age that is considered full term. Most women who have leaking or gushing amniotic fluid will be placed on antibiotics and placed in the hospital because the risk of infection is very high. Once an infection comes, the baby will almost always have to be delivered.

Babies must weigh 500 grams, or about a pound, to survive. Because I was at high risk for PROM and early labor, I kept this day on my calendar and waited with fear for it to pass. For women expecting a normal pregnancy, suddenly having your water break is very frightening. Your are stuck in the hospital, having to rely on what people tell you, and unable to get information on your own. It is scary.

PROM is thought largely to be caused by infections or inflammation of the uterus or fetal membranes. How these infections come or why they cause the membrane rupture is not completely understood. Pelvic exams and yeast infections are NOT considered to increase your risk for PROM. I do know, however, just in reality through talking with women, including a close friend of mine, that PROM tends to recur. Knowing you are at risk and taking all the appropriate precautions is essential to keeping your baby in the uterus as long as possible.

Fortunately, even though PROM cannot always be treated or prevented, most babies are able to make it far enough to survive and lead normal lives. If you have experienced unexplained PROM, I highly recommend finding a doctor with experience with this sort of pregnancy.

Others — Infections, Age, Chronic DiseaseMany infections can cause miscarriage, but they are the big ones like syphilis, mycoplasma, toxoplasmosis, and malaria. An upper respiratory infection is NOT going to cause a miscarriage, even though it may worry you to death. Viruses are the same. Normal illnesses like the common cold will not cause a problem, but AIDS and German Measles can. Infections that directly affect the uterus are bigger risk. This does NOT include yeast infections, which are extremely common in pregnancy. See the section on Premature Rupture of Membranes for more information on these infections.

There are a few common illnesses that can cause a miscarriage or fetal malformation if you get them for the FIRST TIME during pregnancy, including Chicken Pox and Fifth Disease. The vast majority of women already have immunity to these diseases, however, and should not be concerned about exposure to them during pregnancy. If you think you may not have immunity, ask your doctor to run an antibody titer to see if you have a live antibody, or only an old antibody to the disease in your blood. Only the live antibody without the old antibody present is a danger.

An infection that causes a fever of over 101 degrees Fahrenheit should be treated immediately, however. There is a small risk that prolonged fever can affect your baby. Take Tylenol to keep your fever down and stay in touch with your doctor.

Age is only a factor in miscarriage when you consider what aging can do to your body. The first and most common is with chromosomes. It is not YOU who have a problem, it is likely your egg or sperm, which have also aged. Age can, however, bring other problems such as poor health, disease, or hormonal imbalance that can make a pregnancy harder to sustain. You don’t start seeing these problems in great numbers, however, until after 40.Health problems in the mother can create problems with the pregnancy. Diabetes, heart problems, and thyroid disorders are just a few that may complicate the pregnancy. Having these does NOT mean you will certainly have a miscarriage. You will simply have to be more careful and make sure your treatments are adapted if needed during pregnancy.

Accidents typically do not cause a miscarriage. The baby is well protected in its amniotic sac, surrounded by fluid, and even a hard blow to the abdomen will likely only rock it. Most women who have a car accident, even with a certain amount of trauma, have their babies just fine.

The Unknown

The hardest thing to accept is no reason at all. You live in fear, wondering if the same terrible cause of your first baby’s death will cause another one to die. You scarcely dare to try again. I have been in this situation and I tossed my doctor’s statistics aside. I had already been on the wrong side of the statistics; I didn’t care for anymore. But I do know this. One miscarriage hardly raises your chances to miscarry again at all. You are simply back at square one. Try to put the risk as far back in your mind as possible and enjoy another pregnancy. But I understand if you can’t.

Blighted  Ovum, Ectopic Pregnancy, Molar Pregnancy, and Stillbirth

Sometimes a pregnancy ends unhappily, but it is not technically a miscarriage. This section will touch on these types of situations.

Blighted Ovum is a condition (with a terrible, unfortunate name) where the gestational sac grows, the woman gets all the pregnancy symptoms, but the baby itself never develops. The sac will continue to grow and grow, and most women do not know there is no baby until an ultrasound is done. The bleeding, if that happens before the blighted ovum is found via ultrasound, is slow and brown. Your pregnancy symptoms will seem to go away. A blighted ovum is believed to be caused by an egg or sperm with poor genetic material. When the egg is fertilized, instead of creating both a sac and a baby, the part that should be a baby never grows. A D&C is almost always needed to empty the uterus, because the body is very slow to realize there is no baby. Some women do experience more than one blighted ovum, but most women go on to later have a baby.

An Ectopic Pregnancy is a normal fertilized egg that gets stuck in the fallopian tube (although occasionally it will fall into the abdominal cavity) and implants there. This type of pregnancy cannot survive and puts the mother at great risk for severe hemorrhaging and possibly even death as the baby grows and eventually bursts the tube. When the ectopic is discovered based on pain and symptoms rather than an early ultrasound, the mother will immediately have surgery to remove the baby. Things will happen very fast, and most likely if this has happened to you, you are reading this after it is all over. If you are afraid you have an ectopic, the symptoms that you really want to watch for are: sharp, intense pain in your abdomen or possibly in your shoulder; a pregnancy test that is positive, then turns negative a few days later; and spotty red bleeding that continues day after day.  Ectopics that are caught early can be treated with a cancer drug called Methotrexate, which will end the pregnancy safely and without surgery.

Ectopics are usually caused by scar tissue in the fallopian tubes that could have been caused by: previous surgery in the pelvic region, uterus, or tubes; a pelvic infection such as chlamydia or pelvic inflammatory disease; or endometriosis that blocks the entrance to the tubes. If you have had one ectopic, your risk increases for another one. See additional information on treatment. A Molar Pregnancy is a very rare type of pregnancy where an abnormal mass forms inside the uterus after the egg is fertilized. The baby usually does not form, but the uterus is filled with big bubble clusters.  A molar pregnancy is caused when a sperm fertilizes an empty egg (called a complete molar pregnancy) and no baby grows, or when two sperm fertilize an egg and both the baby grows a little as well as an abnormal placenta (called a partial molar.) Even if a baby does grow, it cannot survive. The longest documented molar pregnancy I have seen was a 24-week stillbirth, and most molar pregnancies will be diagnosed and a D&C performed before the end of the first trimester. If a molar pregnancy has been diagnosed, your medical condition will be carefully monitored. In about 15% of molar pregnancies (usually complete molars and not partial), the moles spread to other parts of the body like cancer. A mild form of chemotherapy will have to be used (with methotrexate), but rest assured that the cure rate for this type of disease is very high. The signs of a molar pregnancy include: bleeding in the 12th week of pregnancy, a uterus that is larger than normal, and hCG levels that are too high. The molar pregnancy is removed by a dilating the cervix and gently suctioning out the clusters. Women who have had a molar pregnancy are usually advised not to get pregnant again for at least a year to ensure the cancerous form is not present. It is absolutely essential to follow doctors orders on when to try again with a molar pregnancy diagnosis. Do not cheat, and have regular follow ups even after your hCG is zero, to make sure it does not rise again.8,9

A stillbirth is technically any pregnancy that ends after the 20th week and the baby does not survive. Some babies die in utero and are discovered when the heartbeat is not found. The most common causes of this are: uterine abnormalities, a knot or other umbilical cord accident, infections of the lining of the gestational sac or cord, and placental abruptions that cause the placenta to pull away from the uterine wall. These babies are usually born through the induction of labor, although some babies are small enough to be taken by D&C or D&E procedures.

Other babies are lost through early labor. The causes of early labor are Premature Rupture of Membranes, uterine abnormalities that make the uterus too small to hold the baby, and an incompetent cervix, which opens up and lets the baby out. Sometimes a stillbirth occurs during the birth, by an umbilical cord that gets pinched between the baby’s head and the cervix, or the cord wraps around the baby’s neck. Repeat stillbirths are extremely rare and are almost all related to uterine or cervix problems, which can be fixed or treated once found.

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I know you may be frightened by what you’re going through. Remember Deanna has a private group on Facebook to help.

91 Comments »

  Jo Waller wrote @ September 13, 2007 at 4:29 pm

Hi,
I lost our first baby in May, a ‘missed’ miscarriage at just over 6 weeks, and discovered today that I have just miscarried again despite not realising I was pregnant. Thanks so much for taking the time and making the effort to produce this website, as I have found it helpful and reassuring to read tonight, on my first visit.
Thanks, Jo. (Lancashire, UK.)

  lmfinnegan wrote @ September 16, 2007 at 11:20 pm

Hi,
I want to start out by saying, I could not of made it through my m/cs without this site.I had 2 m/c last year and I thought my world was over .I came to this site everyday for support.I got so much support from this site.I am pleased to say that I just gave birth to a 7lb baby boy.I did not give up.I will never forget the angels I lost.

  LaToya Harris wrote @ October 2, 2007 at 3:17 pm

Hello, Just decided to write feeling kind of down today. I’m 25 and I have had 4 miscarriages, and no live births. I’m currently seeing a specialist which is not seeming to give any answers. I never held a baby over 12 weeks. And as soon as I find out I’m Pregnant I have already started bleeding and cramping but I just go through the process of fully micarrying for the next few weeks. I often wonder will I ever have a baby. Can anyone oofer me any advice.

  Deanna wrote @ October 2, 2007 at 5:16 pm

Hello LaToya,

I am so sorry you have had such a hard time with pregnancy. It is so devastating.

What makes you feel your specialist is not getting any answers? Have all your tests come out normal? Or is he/she not really talking to you about what to expect? Your relationship with your doctor is the single most important factor in sustaining a pregnancy–this is medically proven. Make sure you feel you are getting really good care.

Just do the best you can each day. I know it seems very scary and impossible, but moms have to have a lot of faith and hope, determination and strength.

Let me know how you are doing.

Deanna

  Chrisetta_Clayton@yahoo.com wrote @ October 9, 2007 at 6:00 pm

Hi Latoya,

I just want to encourage you to be strong in the Lord, I too have lost three babies and I am pregnant again. I started bleeding yesterday after having sex. I am 28 years old and have been married for 6 years. I know that God controls the birth conal, and when it is time he will bless you with your hearts desire. You will hold a child in your arms. I will hold a child in my arms. And even though the devil wants me to focus on the fact that I am bleeding. Watch God work a miracle, believe and you shall receive. IT IS DONE! IN JESUS NAME!!!

  cate wrote @ February 3, 2008 at 3:03 pm

hi,
i have had two miscarriages in the past 6 months and i know it has only been two but being 19 i am horrified at the fact of never being able to have a child. The first child i didnt carry past 9 weeks and the miscarriage i had last night i was 5 weeks. I know that i am still young but like i said me and my partner are afraid that we will never have a child. We have done everything possible to keep the child healthy but nothig has worked. Someone please give me hope in this.
Thanks

  Shalana Evans wrote @ March 2, 2008 at 2:44 am

on Feb 26th i miscarried a 5 ounce 5 1/2 inch little boy my world fell apart i was only 15 weeks. I realized finally he was needed in Heaven and he was so special that God wanted him more. I have a 2 yr old son and i had the same problems as with this one. i am so thankful that i got to hold him in my arms and name him then i could let him go peacefully but that was not good enough i wanted him back thats all i could say i have to thank my son for giving me hope. for such a little boy he can do wonders by making mommy feel better. after reading everyones comments it really does make me feel good knowing there is people who i can talk to and get help from to get over my loss. thank you

  Agatha wrote @ April 9, 2008 at 8:31 pm

Hello, I have had 2 m/c and both occurred during the first trimester. I had some tests done (pelvic ultrasound & pelvic MRI). I was told that I either had a septate uterus or a bicornuate uterus. A few days ago, my doctor performed a hysteroscopy because she wanted to look inside my uterus, and apparently I have a really thick septum. Did your doctor recommend you have your septum removed? I was told that there could be complications and removing it could cause problems with my fertility. But then I think that if I don’t have it removed, I will probably just miscarry again. Thank you for creating this site and sharing your story.

  sarah wrote @ July 14, 2008 at 9:55 am

i lost my little girl when i was 36 weeks pregnant.

  Kimberly wrote @ November 4, 2008 at 4:06 pm

Hi, I am 35 years old and have had 2 m/c My first one happened before I was 6 weeks and now this one happened at around 7 weeks and it has been so hard and I feel like all I do is wait for my hcg levels do drop to zero so I can start trying again. I go in every week to the doctor for blood work and it has stayed at 58 hcg for about 3 weeks. I am so frustrated because I chose to not have a d&c and now I feel like if I had, this would all be over and we could start trying again. ( I m/c early september) I worry this will happen agian and I worry that I am getting to old to have any more kids. I also thought that I had a period a few weeks ago because I stopped bleeding for about 2 weeks and then got all the normal syptoms and it lasted about 5 days which is very normal for me. Could this be possible and is there anything I can do to drop my hcg levels. I was told I could not get pregnant with it this high.
Thank you

  LaTonya wrote @ December 4, 2008 at 2:39 pm

Hi everyone! I just found out I miscarried this morning and I was referred to this site to help me cope. I know GOD has a plan and it was not meant to be for me this time but I’m so very sad. I laugh to hide the tears since I’m usually a very happy person. I just keep blaming myself for something I had to do wrong since I have pcos???? I try to believe it was just suppose to be and I will have a baby one day….I’m just so sad.

  brittany wrote @ December 24, 2008 at 11:45 am

i just had a miscarriage two weeks ago. It started with me bleeding but when i told my doctor he said that everything would be fine it’ll go away in a few days. Then two days later my waterbroke. i nwas only 15 weeks and this just crushed my heart. So i had to get my labor enduced and give birth to my son. I often blame myself but i want answers that no one can give to me. I wasnt ready to be a mother but i was gonna get prepared with the 5 mths i had left. I often wake up crying dreaming about my son and i want him back but i cant get him back

  rebecca wrote @ January 23, 2009 at 2:11 am

hello everyone, i recently had a m/c and im really down.it was an unexpected pregnancy and i could not hold my excitement to see a positive result.my partner was really happy and being 28 i thought now is the time.my best friend was going through ivf and found out she fell pregnant on the same day.we discussed baby showers,shopping ,christenings,and our babies being the best of friends,just as we are.the light bleeding began in early january, and became much heavier earlier the next mourning.i refused to see that anything was wrong,i had no pain and the extensive reading i had revised told me that bleeding was fine as long as there was no clotting.2 hours at the hospital and i was told what i was denying all along,i had m/c my first child.its been 3 weeks now, and i have not seen my best friend.i wish nothing but the best for her but find it too hard to be around her knowing she is pregnant, and im not. i love children and im finding this really hard but i know it will ease with time.all i want to find out now is if the m/c was chromosomal or hormonal.now is the time in my life that i feel for every women in the world that has been through a m/c. god is with you and god bless.

  maci wrote @ January 27, 2009 at 8:15 am

hello,
I’m 27 years old and I have just went thru my 1st m/c. it is the hardest thing for me and my husband. he was so happy when he was finally right that I was pregnant(lol). I was not expecting it at all but got used to the fact that this is apart of me…i began to love him almost more than my husband at 16wks god called him and we had no answers to how and why so early.we had so many hopes and dreams for him. we used to imagine what kind of parents we would be. I’m writing to this website to see if anyone can give us some ideas and suggestions on how to cope with this situation. we are in great need of how. thanks maci

  Tysha wrote @ February 5, 2009 at 6:34 pm

Hello, Im 38 yrs old and I had a miscarriage and ectopic pregnancy few years ago. I was very hard and I didn’t think I could get pregnant again. Three weeks ago found out I was pregnant. It was unexpected but I was so excited, after all these years, finally. I was worried because of my previous history but I was praying and hoping that everything was going to be OK. My first appointment was this week and the doctor did not find anything wrong and sent me to do an ultrasound. Sadly it showed that my baby of almost ten weeks did not have a heartbeat. It broke my heart. The last few days I’ve been doing blood tests to confirm that the pregnancy hormone level is going down what means that my pregnancy is nonviable. I’m in no pain, no bleeding, no cramps, nothing. I do not understand. The doctor only says that I have to wait until my body is ready to release it. Is there an explanation for this? What happened? Please, someone help me to understand.

  Shirly wrote @ February 9, 2009 at 2:55 pm

Hi.am new to this website but am still here because i have found peace in it.last week i miscarried my first baby and my heart was crashed.i started bleeding and went to the hospital.i visited 3 different hospitals because i dint want to bliv what the doctors told me.at last i had a D/C.since then i have felt lonely and moody and cry all the time.am 21 but am worried that it will happen again.my patner and i realy love babies.with all this happening,i still bliv that God has the best reasons.so dont give up

  rebecca wrote @ February 10, 2009 at 5:29 am

hi maci, its rebecca,ive written on this site and i understand how u feel. it was my 1st m/c aswell. all i can suggest to you is to talk about it when you can to the people closest to you.it is very important to express your feelings.even for your 1st m/c doctors will say no test can be done and they assume that it is chromosomal.im getting hormonal tests done to rule that out.for most women it is chomosomal,and sadly we cannot do anything about it.know that it had nothing to do with you and it was not your fault.im still coming to terms with that but,…..its true.know that you will have a healthy baby and have a beautiful family.you cannot give up…..im not.ive been with my fiance for 6yrs and i will not give up the dream of being a mummy…..neither should you.keep the faith, and know youll soon be a mum….and a great one at that ……..take care!!!

  Kelly wrote @ February 16, 2009 at 5:21 pm

Hello. I’m 34 with a beautiful little girl who will be 4 in April. I had 3 miscarriages in a matter of a year and a half, then ‘accidentally’ became pregnant with my little Gracie. I was so upset with myselft for allowing another pregnancy. However, she turned out perfect. The m/cs were devastating, and even with her, I couldn’t fully have joy like other pregnant women did. It just didn’t seem fair, but then she came along. So, know that if it’s meant to be, it will happen. I know how hard it is….but you’ve got to have faith that it will work out for the best.

  kathy wrote @ March 4, 2009 at 4:38 pm

Hi i am 40 years old and just had another miscarriage, just last week , i had a miscarrriage 4 years ago and just became pregnant unexpectically, i made it to 9 weeks then i was told by ultrasound that my baby was dead, just the week before i heard the heart beat, which was strong, i have 2 grown children 20 and 18, i have always wanted more children but i do not ovulate on a regular month to month basis i have polinsistic ovaries, i really want to try again on a fertility drug my doctor is agreeing for me to do this but i am really scared i wil miscarry again, i had to have a d/c this time can anyone give me some advive

  susan Martins wrote @ April 6, 2009 at 4:38 am

Hi am 34, i lost my little boy 5 months ago when i was 37 weeks pregnant due to premature rupture of the membrane, and i want to get pregnant again, should i go ahead, will the problem repeat again. please advice me fast.

  Karmen lilu wrote @ June 9, 2009 at 11:21 am

Dont worry about having a miscarriage 4 times. I went through that too. Just make sure that when you get pregnant the next time, do not spend any time reading up on anything, as I am sure that you know everything you already kinow. Always keep folic acid around to take before and after you find out that your pregnat. Relax and do not wear any high heels any at all. Most of all, do not stress or worry that you are going to mis carry. So not think about it any at all until you are 4 1/2 months pregant.

  Mo wrote @ August 1, 2009 at 10:46 pm

Having gone through a miscarriage this year, I now know to never ask anyone, “Soooo, when are you guys going to have a kid?”
And to be honest, I don’t think my friends who knew I was pregnant and lost the baby will EVER ask anyone that again. It’s the perfect example of the fact that you have no idea what people are dealing with internally. It’s seemingly so harmless and innocent, but for someone who has suffered a miscarriage and didn’t sky-write the fact that they did, it can be an emotional disaster.
I do my best to smile and say, “It’s not time yet,” but inside, it kills me. In the questioners’ defense, they didn’t know — no reason for me to lose it.
The same goes for asking people about getting married. I got so tired of that before my husband and I were engaged. My response was, “I’ll do it when I’m good and ready to,” with no pressure from anyone else.
I guess the same goes for kids.

  vivian wrote @ August 4, 2009 at 3:37 pm

wow as much research as ive done ive never read this site before. ive had three m/c within the past two yrs all within the first six weeks of pregnancy .me an my husband want kids so bad an we pray an pray to be blessed with kids. were in the ministry an work with kids an sometimes its really hard to be so attached to them an want our own so bad an continue to fail.. now i want to be preg but im scared to be preg be cuz i fear losing another baby cuz i dont no the cause of our three losses.. i have four people close to me that are preg an im happy for them but its hard to be happy when i feel so empty an want a baby of my own so badly

  Britttany wrote @ August 8, 2009 at 2:36 am

I just had a D&C this past Wednesday due to a miscarriage at 9 weeks. I’m only 19 and this was not a planned pregnancy, but my first baby none this less. I was crushed when i first found i was pregnant, no lie. But even before my first ultrasound i realized i was in a good situation all around for a baby just a little young, i began to get so excited. Its all i could think and talk about, i was so happy. To be a mom was my dream, i was living my dream. Well my second ultrasound there was no more heartbeat and no growth. My world was crushed having surgery the next day. I couldn’t understand why this happened to me, no family problems with pregnancy, and me myself have never had ANY health problems at all till now. Even though this was not a planned pregnancy and now is not the time to be pushing for another baby, thats all i can think about is trying again and again for a baby. I want a baby more than anything now, even though i know everyone keeps telling me this is a second chance to further my education to give my child a better life in the long run. Is this a normal reaction? I can’t get it off my mind with any distraction.

08/05/09- i love you

  Jessica wrote @ August 11, 2009 at 3:45 am

HI everyone..I know how devastaing it can be to have a misscarriage. I had one back in Feb and I was 12 weeks. I had already had an ultasound and got to hear my babys heartbeat. I was so excited and love kids. I am only 20 but was looking forward to bringing a new life into the world. Through out the pregnancy I had worries of misscarriage. Ive always felt as though I couldnt have kids for some unexplainable reason. When I found out I was pregnant I was so happy, maybe my thoughts were wrong after all. I miscarried right around valentines day. I had terrible cramps all day anto the night hours. I went to the bathroom and passed what I believed was a blood clot. Once the cramps were to the point I couldn’t take it any more I went to the hospital and was informed I was having a misscarriage. I had to have a D & C. Theres nothing more terrrible then waking up in a hospital bed knowing that your baby who was once growing inside you is now just gone for no explainable reason. I cried and held my stomach and wanted nothing more than to have my baby back. My heart goes out to all those who have had a misscarrige and a broken heart. I guess my unexplainable thoughts of never having a baby might of been true. I’ve tried since to get pregnant but no luck. I dont know whats worse not being able to get pregnant to have the chance of having a baby, or getting pregnant and losing your baby after a short amount of time

  Racheal wolfe wrote @ October 13, 2009 at 11:21 am

my due date was saposed 2 be april/10/10, on my last apointment the baby was so perfect and active in every way , i’m a total health nut when i am with child i do not eat or drink or put anything in on and around my body that i am not saposed 2 .. about 11 days ago i was at my aunts house , that morning i wasn’t feeling well at all , but that wasn’t any thing new , i was pretty sick threwout the pregnancy, but the baby was thriving and perfect as i said . that morning i was frighting or argueing with my sometimes boyfriend , we left on a bad note my dad came 2 get me 2 take me 2 my aunts it was almost an hour drive 2 balston spa , my kids were being little animals in the car mostly my 3 year old its a long drive 4 a small child .finally we got my aunts house i sat at the table with her and my dad tells us that he is going 2 the grosery store of corse my 10 year old wants 2 go so she can get some alone time with grandpa she loves my dad its so funny the way she fawns over him . khloe stayed behind she was after my aunts dog , poor dog lol , they had just left when i went 2 get up from the chair when i felt a sudden gusk of water and alot of it it was like i peed my pants but with a different
sensation, i ran 4 the bathroom , my aunt had no idea what had happened ,when i got 2 the toilette i sat down ,there was so much blood my heart sunk and started racing i was sobbing and saying no please god no not the baby , but i knew it was all over i needed 2 go 2 the hospital,the baby would be no more .. it was 1 of the saddest moments of my life or so i thought ,it was about 2 get alot worse .. i cleaned my self up and got up 2 go wash my hands but there was something on the floor i looked closer …………… it was my baby … it was horrible just awful ,reality came and hit me like a mack truck my baby was really dead and there was nothing i could do about it ….. i picked up my baby off the floore and held it in my hands … i was crying so hard i was choking on my tears .. i went 2 the sink and turned on the water .. i washed my baby off .. i looked at it long and hard .. i was in a daze … when i snapped out of it i checked the baby 4 its sex it was a boy .. he was the son i has been waiting 4 lifeless in my hands i will never hold him alive ever … look i’m not saying that if he was a she i would have been less upset , the whole thing was just so emotional, i wrapped the baby in a wash cloth and my aunt gave me a wooden box i put him in the box i didn’t let him go untill i got 2 the hospital but i’m jumping a head , i called my doctor i was bleeding alot i mean alot .. i was told 2 go 2 albany med wich was another long ass drive but i wanted 2 see my doctor … it seamed like 4 ever the drive went on and on it was hard 4 me but i had 2 keep it 2gether 4 the kids .. my dad dropped me off at albany med alone he had 2 take the kids home 4 me my boyfriend had 2 watch them …. i was alone all alone and i had 2 go 2 labor and delivery 2 see my doc……. there was a woman there check herself and her newborn son out of the hospital , it made my heart ache more i justed starting crying all over again … finally i was led 2 my room still clutching the box close 2 me i asked her rather sheepishly what were they going 2 do with the baby .. i to,ld her that i didn’t want him 2 end up in some med waste garbage heap .. she told me that they were going 2 send him 2 patholgy 2 see what went wrong and she informed me that they may not be able 2 tell why it happened .. i was wondering 2 myself what about after what was going 2 happen to him after pathology but 4 some reason i clammed up , i still have no idea what they did with his body…in the room alone there was a phone i called my best friend i felt so alone and vonerable i felt like i was the only person on thisearth who cared 4 my lost baby … but in reality other people did care and the doctors and nurses were all very nice and supportive , my best friend was very worried about the fact that i was face ing this all by my lonesome so she insisted on calling her mom 2 come and stay with me 4 some kind of support system … i felt foolish i don’t know why i just did sometimes when some 1 wants 2 be there 4 me its hard 2 except i feel like i don’t deserve it , i even hung up with her and a few min later i called ma (thats what i call her she has really been there 4 me over the years but thats another story) i tried 2 talk her out of comming … of corse i lost no wins an agruement with mama O. lol i am really grateful that i had her in my corner , shortly after she got there my doc came in and told me he was worried about the amoutnt of bleeding i was doing and that i lost alot of blood they #1 were thinking about giving me a blood tranfusion and #@ they had 2 give me a d&c … he also informed me that i needed some blood work and 2 iv’s and #3 i needed 2 speak with the and i know that i’m spelling this wrong annestegologist ok thats the best i can do i’m an awful speller, he was a very sweet and soft spoken man , he explained the d & c 2 me what thay were going 2 do 2 me and that i was going 2 be knocked out and how long it was going 2 take and what was 2 happen after also when i would ba allowed 2 go home , mama o stayed by my side and i think if they would have let her she would have gone in the O.R. with me she a good person…… now here comes the IV”S and blood work attempts 4 different people tried 2 get my blood they could not i ended up getting stuck 13 times in the end i did get the 2 iv’s and they had 2 take my blood from my arttery it hurt so bad but at least it got the job done ,,,, hours later they took me into the O R i was so scared it was freezing in this steral white room , i asked why it was so cold and they told me that it deterrs bacteria from growing ……. he put a mask on my face it was just oxygen and then he put something in my iv then told me that i would start 2 get drowzy last thing i remember b4 i woke up was telling him i was perfectly aware , then i was being told that it was over and was going 2 the recovery room of corse mamaO was there i felt fine in the body but down in the soul … i wanted 2 go home i couldn’t wait 2 go home i just wanted 2 sleep and cry and greive and quite frankley i really wanted 2 be alone , that wish never came true i still need that time but still won’t get it … the days after well the first 3 anyway i was like a zombie i felt dead inside i felt like i was the only person who wanted the baby , i just cried and stared off in space i know i sound like a big baby but i’m really being honest then 1 day i just wake up and was very thankful 4 the 2 beautiful children i do have … i am still struggling over the depression i’m usaully on depression med but haven’t been on them in over 4 months because i was waiting 4 my first trimester 2 be over my gyno was going 2 give them 2 me at my next apointment , and iam going threw a post pardom thing also so my hormones are all out of wack when the kids go 2 bed i have more time 2 think and it stills hits me3 then i still picture the lifeless body of my lost son , ant i still feel angry at god or who ever 4 taking him from me but i’m trying really hard 2 just function and live life on a nday 2 day basis … now i know that is really personal and most people would not post such a thing but i’m not most people so right or wrong here it i hope it helps some 1 else with thier loss and lets them know that they are not alone and all your feeling and thought are normal , ok well that all folks good bye and thank you 4 reading and hopefully understanding the raw thought and feelings and my honesty oh yea please forgive my type o’s and my spelling my 10 year old spells better then me …

  SJ wrote @ October 31, 2009 at 1:19 pm

I am in the middle of m/c right now at 5.5 weeks. I am 34 and was always the girl that never wanted kids…..then this surprise. I told the father i was pg last Sat (he’s not my bf, but a close friend of 6 years) and he was very supportive. The bleeding/cramping started Monday….I knew something wasn’t right. Now it’s a week later and my hcg is 111 and dropping. I told the father and he now refuses to talk to me, thinking I did this someway, somehow. As if i’m not going through enough right now, his attitude is just tearing me up. Not sure why i’m even telling you all this on here….Its just comforting to see there are others out there, and that I will get through this, with or without his support. God bless you all and all of our little angels.

  Rik wrote @ November 6, 2009 at 3:07 pm

Hello,
I have had two miscarriages within 14 months. In first miscarriage I was normal I hadn’t any pain Doctor gave me some medicines to remove blood clot but it didn’t work totally and I had surgery(BHCG). Again we try after my hormone level went to Zero. Again I was pregnant, that time I feel uneasy with my belly. Doctor ask me “Do you feel like you are pregnant.” I’m afraid I said yes. That time also it didn’t work. Doctor gave me pills to flush blood clot. There was bleeding and cramping.I took rest for some days. I couldn’t tolerate, my husband and I went to St. Peter hospital I have to stay whole night and two more days. The sharp cramping was in left side in my belly.
After a week we met doctor and he suggest me to test blood again. They reported some problem in antibody. Again they called me to test blood after a month. I did and I called them for my blood report. They said there is no change. They send me to the thyroid doctor. They said it was normal. I don’t know what to do? They told me that if antibody level didn’t change they will give some medicine but they didn’t talk about it now. Now they suggest me to meet another doctor.
There is a group of doctors and one day one doctor next time another. Does it matter or not if i checked with different doctors within a group?

Please help me what will be the best solution.

  J.S. wrote @ December 8, 2009 at 2:14 pm

Hello,

I had my m/c with my first pregnancy. We had to have a D&C on 10/21/09. For some reason my body was not passing the baby. And I am pregnant again. I am 5 weeks give a day or two. I did not expect to get pregnant again, because I was a fertility patient. So I was very surprized. I have not gotten over my first lost and I am terrified I will lose this one. So far my levels are going up, but I just feel so scared.
I am glad I found this site, it really helps with things.

  Tonia wrote @ December 21, 2009 at 10:24 pm

This is a wonderful site that has helped me when I needed it most. I am grateful to everyone that has shared their stories of their precious angels. I am currently lying in bed alone once again waiting & praying for it not to happen for the 3rd time in 3 years. I started bleeding a few days ago and once again went to the Dr and was told it was a “Threatened Miscarriage” and to go home and see what happens. My first thought was WOW, what did I ever do that was so bad to deserve another loss. I’ve been married for a little over 3 years now and my family has not spoke to me since. Our life is unusual to begin with because we travel all year long because my husband has a trained animal act so our RV is our home. SO I havent had the chance to make any new friends due to us being in a different city practically every week or so. So this site has been my only support in going thru the loss of 2 and now possibly 3 precious gifts from God. My hisband never wanted kids but knew i did so he waited until after our marriage to say so. We eventually agreed on waiting five years which was ok with me. But God had other plans & 3 months into our marriage we got pregnant. Thats when I first realized just how badly I wanted to be a mother. I mean I always knew that I wanted children but as soon as I saw that positive sign on that stick it was as if my whole world, wants & needs changed. But the excitement was very short lived because as soon as I told my husband he became very angry with me. As if I had done it on purpose. I cried for 2 weeks sraight and by the 3rd week after finding out I was with child I miscarried. My world went completely dark and I still have not been able to stop blaming myself or all of the “what if” thoughts that haunt me in my dreams every night. I was a different person after that and it was never spoke about since. I cried and tried to talk to my husband but he said,well it was for the best because we agreed on 5 years. He just didnt get it and didnt even want to try and understand or help me thru my feeling of sorrow for the loss of my child or the trauma of having to go to an abortion clinic to have everything removed. I remember sitting in this room with about 15 other women and thinking why? I wanted my baby and thses women are sitting in here with precious babies inside of them with heartbeats & life that they have chosen for one reason or another couldn’t have. I remember when they called me back to put the IV in because I wanted to be asleep during it. I didnt want to hear, feel or see them remove my angel whose heart beat was the only memory I had left except for the one that I cant seem to forget, the memory of the nurse then Dr not being able to find it again. So I needed to not “be there” while they removed a piece of me. When I woke up I immediately began crying and asking for my baby, if
they were able to save him or her. Clearly the meds they gave me did not help because I know they could not save a 9 week old fetus that had passed at 7 weeks but I still cried for my child and still do. Life was never the same after that until October 07 when once again we were pregnat. But thank God that pregnacy went perfect with the love of my life coming into this world on July 4,2008 at *:26 am weighing in at a hefty 8lbs 6 ounces. Thats love, the greatest most purest and most beautiful love that anyone could ever be blessed to receive. All of a sudden my dark world became bright again.He’s perfect! He’s so happy and loving 24/7 and everyday I thank the Lord above for him. But sometimes when were playing and he’s laughing or just comes and gets in my lap I cant help but think of my other angels, if they would have been a boy or girls, who they would look like and their scent. you know how babies have that new baby scent that you just want to soak up. so my precious son help me heal a little and then when he was 6 mths old it happened again. This time I didnt even know I was with child and it just happened really quickly and fast at home.Its an awful thing to actually have something fall out of you and you have no clue what it is and then once you look closely and realize oh my god thats my child. that has traumatized me forever. I dropped to my knees and tried to pick it all up and was hysterical it was just plain awful and no one should ever have to thru that. And here I am again lying in bed just waiting. Sorry for such long post but hearing everyone else’s stories has helped me more than words could express. Thank you for letting me know that I’m not alone in this,

  shay wrote @ December 28, 2009 at 6:58 pm

I’m laying here in bed feeling absolutely crushed. I just experienced my first miscarriage which started on Christmas eve. Initially, I didn’t want to believe that it was happening because there was no pain at all. However, when I woke up on Christmas day I knew that my precious baby was gone. The tingling in my breasts was gone…overnight! After that there was pain, contractions, cramping and more pain. I am appauled at the attitudes of the medical providers that treated me. Today, the ER physician removed the remnants of the fetus and dropped it in a cup in front of me. I was speechless. My husband and I have been crying our eyes out for 5 days now but hopefully the worst is behind us. We tried to get pregnant for over a year so we are simply devastated that it ended this way. I thank GOD for my precious 2 year old but I will never forget the angel that I lost this Christmas. We will try again soon. Thank you for this site. Be blessed.

  Erika wrote @ January 1, 2010 at 11:23 pm

I also miscarried on Christmas morning after spotting on Christmas day. I was woken up by very strong cramps and bleeding and knew what was happening. I was nine weeks pregnant and felt great the whole time. Since I am 39 I knew that my chances to m/c would be higher and I thought I was prepared but my emotions have taken me by surprise. I have been on a roller coaster ride of tears and anger that rushes over me every few days. My doctor luckely was very understanding as he removed remaining tissue to make sure I would not end up with an infection. My emotions are still out of whack and they seem to attack me in waves. I am glad I found this site to help me process all my sadness and fears. I hope we will be able to have a child.

  angela wrote @ January 11, 2010 at 5:32 pm

after 2 live births at a very early age i decided to have a IUD placed in mt uterus after 5 yrs i had it removed and i got pregnant right away only to have a miscarriage at 8 wks.to make a long story short i have had 10 miscarriages total and 10 d&c Ive had testing for chromosones,throid x13 factor and still have no answers everything seems to be normal Im trying to have the dye in my uterus to see if theres possible scarring I am totally frustrated and would appreciate any comments or suggestions as i would like to get pregnant this summmer. im keeping the faith and you all should too. ang

  Kisha M. wrote @ January 12, 2010 at 3:00 pm

I misccaried at 10 weeks the day after New Year’s. I had been spotting for a few days but didn’t worry too much b/c every book that I had read stated that light spotting was nothing to be concerned about, especially around the time that you would normally have your period. Well that wasn’t the case with me. New Year’s eve I realized that the spotting was becoming heavier and became concerned. This continued on to New Year’s day and then January 2nd I began to bleed as if I was having a heavy period. Ironically I was at TARGET purchasing maternity clothes.

I rushed home and headed straight for the bathroom only to have my nightmare confirmed. I had a huge clot right there and I knew that by baby was gone. I really didn’t want to go to the ER b/c I felt like there was no purpose. I knew nothing could be done but my husband insisted that I go. The doctors told me that it was most like due to chromosomal abnormality.

It’s been a little over a week and I have my days, some good and some bad. I know time will make things easier but it’s a rollercoaster ride right now. Some days I want to try and get pregnant right away and then other days I just want to wait for a while. This past pregnancy was definitely not planned but my husband and I were very excited and happy.

  Roxy wrote @ February 4, 2010 at 4:03 am

Hi I’m 20 years old and experienced a m/c in December 3 days after Christmas I was 10 weeks. It was my first m/c with my first pregnancy. I can say that it was the most horrible thing that I have experienced in my life.
I never had any cramps or any pains what so ever just woke up the Monday morning went to the toilet and saw that I was bleeding but it was lightly. Called my fiancé from work and told him we had to go to the hospital. I had no fear in me but I just thought let me rather be safe than sorry. As soon as he came we went to the hospital and I got checked out immediately and they informed me that I had miscarried.
A week later I had gone back to get my test results and found out that it was a lack of hormone growth which was something that nearly all my family members had gone through. All the doctor had told me was to start taking a folic acid to improve my hormone growth so that when I do decide to fall pregnant again it decreases the risk of another m/c, he as well told me if I liked I could start immediately trying to fall pregnant. What I have learnt from this whole ordeal is to trust that God does have a plan for you.
Wish all the best to everybody going through and who has gone through this ordeal.

God bless

  Jenn wrote @ February 21, 2010 at 8:20 pm

Can anyone tell me if they experoenced a miscarriage due to the baby’s lymph system not draining correctly?
At my last ultrasaound ( I am 13 weeeks and 2 DAYS) we were told that despite our past ultrasound and the baby having a strong herat beat that I have an 80% chance of miscarrying this baby. If the swelling doesn”t reduce remarkably within 2 weeks,,,,they are suggesting that I undergo an amnicentis to find out why this happened, to help us with future pregnancies.
We remarked that would take the 2 weeks to decide and pray for a miracle, but was told that science was a better thing to believe in.
Does anyone have any information about the build of fluid around a baby’s neck, spine and tummy due to the lymph system not draining? Any info or statistics would be benefical.
Thank you so much, and my thoughts are with all of you who have lost a child.

Jenn

  Nicola wrote @ February 24, 2010 at 5:48 am

Hi all,

A little help or advise maybe!!!

I fell pregnant in June 2003 and had a healthy son in March 2004. The following Febuary (2005) i fell pregnant again but lost the baby in April. I bled continuously until August (i was put on pills). I then fell pregnant in the September with identical twins and lost both within days of each other in the November.

Now 5yrs later i’ve had another one. Now think my uterus is diseased!!!

My periods are regular and i am always on time! I was due on Jan 26th (2010) I had 6 pregnancy symptons but again didn’t feel quite right! Then on the Saturday (4 days after my period was due) i had extremly bad cramps in the centre of my lower abdomen and started bleeding (then all my symptons started to go away) . This lasted 3-4 days.

I am convinced with all the symptons etc that i was pregnant. I can’t believe that 5yrs later when all should have been settled that my body has let me down again. I’m 35 now and chances are decreasing!! Don’t know if i can face going through anything again but unfortunately the body clock is still ticking and so are my emotions!!

  nthabi wrote @ March 7, 2010 at 4:09 pm

i’ve just m/c today at 6 weeks. it started off with light spotting yesterday morning, I rushed to the doctor & he said it was nothing to worry about. in the afternoon the bleeding got heavier & I went to the ER, again they told me not 2 worry. this afternoon I started seeing clots & the bleeding got heavier, I knew that my angel was gone. I went to the ER again & my worst fear was confirmed. i’m so devastated right now because I really wanted this baby. i’ve cried my eyes out but I know it will be fine one day.

  chantal wrote @ March 23, 2010 at 5:29 am

I can’t believe that i am finding myself “here”- a few weeks ago, all the reading and research was on “your weekly pregnancy development” but now, We are all trying to find answers, hope and consolation. Ladies, be strong in the Lord. I went for my 11 week scan on Wednesday 17th March, only to find out that my baby did’nt make it at 9 weeks or so. I was devastated to say the least. I have two little boys (4 and 2) and although i was shocked at the realisation of having to change nappies for another 2 years or so, when i found out i was expecting- after 2 days, i welcomed my baby and prayed daily for my baby’s development..But now, it’s like playing a game of snakes and ladders- got all the way up the ladder (long or short)- and then the snake- all the way down. Ladies- Cry if you need to, speak aloud those inner most hurts and questions to no one if it helps- cause it does. Allow yourself to grieve but encourage yourself in the hope of trying again. I am hopefull that we will be successful at our next attempt but at the same time, afraid that it might not happen in “our time”- only God knows.. My prayers are with all of you.

  tanya wrote @ April 2, 2010 at 2:56 pm

Oh Chantal … you and I are mirror-images here. On Thursday, March 12th we went for our 12 week appt and the baby had no heartbeat. Turns out the baby died at 8weeks 5days – one day after our first OB ultrasound – seeing the little one with a strong heartbeat. We had a d&c because the thought of letting the m/c happen naturally was too hard – especially since the baby was gone for so long – how much longer would we have to wait. I too wasn’t positive at first – my other babies are 5 and 2, but then I got excited, and prayed and all the rest!
We went for the follow-up appt yesterday. Turns out I have hyperthyroid and protein s deficiency, but both of these could be caused during pregnancy AND they can cause miscarriages. They took more blood and now we are in a “wait and see” game. This is my second miscarriage. This site has helped me so much – with knowing what to expect after the d&c, and especially with making me feel like I have a right to grieve.
I kind of figure that God doesn’t make mistakes – he knew us before we were conceived. But he can’t help the imperfections of the flesh. The little ones we lose will be ours someday. I truly believe that my second, Hyla, is the one I lost just before I got pregnant with her – the timing and situations are just too strange not to be! Bless you all.

  Brittany wrote @ December 13, 2010 at 4:57 pm

I believe out of all this info I just don’t fit. I lost my baby at 12 weeks at home. The baby was fully formed into a baby just really small. I don’t really no what happened I just got really bad cramps and started to bleed very badly. The doctor said I lost so much blood that I has an IV in both arms. I was not awake through that. But I still deal wit it everyday of my life hoping to never have to go through that again. We named here Lola rose and gave her a star in the sky. It has been a year now. My only encouragement is to be strong,and god never gives u more then u can handle. God bless to all u who lost a little one, your not alone

  Tresa wrote @ December 14, 2010 at 12:37 am

Hi, first of all, I’m very grateful I found this website. After reading through it, and these other stories, I dont feel quite so alone.
November 20th I had a miscarriage, I was 15 weeks. Pretty much everything had been going good, except I had placenta previa, but by that time most of the tiredness and the nausea started going away (it was REALLY bad in the beginning of the pregnancy). 2 days befor I lost it I started to have very very light bleeding, it was mostly brown. So I went straight to the doctor, I even left in the middle of work because I was so nervous, due to the fact I also sort of had an uncomfortable twinge on the lower right side of my abdomen, not really pain, just not right feeling. So I saw a doctor, not my normal one, and he examined me, and said everything was ok, it was probably just old blood because of the brown color, and we listened to the heartbeat, he said it sounded good. So I went home. The next day, the bleeding didnt go away, but it didnt get worse, however the pain started getting worse. It would come and go, get REALLY bad every few minutes.By the 20th the pain was so bad it made my head hurt, the worse it got it made me feel like I wanted to puke. My boyfriend left that night around 11 to go to work, I had been trying to sleep since 9, having no success because the pain was so unbearable. At like, 1 in the morning the pain started going lower and lower, and getting sharper. Around 1:30 I felt a wierd popping feeling in my lower stomache, and then I thought I peed myself. Water just kept coming out, and there was little spots of blood in it. After realizing it was time to go to the hospital, having my car not start, and having to call an ambulance because I was freaking out, and being the idiot that I am I couldn’t come to terms with what was happening. I still feel stupid for thinking I was peeing the whole time and just couldnt hold it in. After laying in the hospital bed waiting for the nurses to do something or tell me what was going on for an hour, I felt and really big gush of liquid, I got up and started freaking out and crying and yelling at them to do something, because before that the liquid was clear, this time iwas blood, and then I thought I was still peeing blood, so they gave me a cup, and told me to go get a urine sample in the bathroom, I walked to the bathroom, crying the whole way because I was so scared and worried. When I sat down, I put the cup down there, and I felt like i couldnt go, so I kind of pushed, and the baby fell in the cup. I looked out, and saw it, its little hand, I screamed, I was so devastated. The dr. and nurse came in the bathroom and told me I needed to get up and lay on the bed, but my baby was still hanging from me, it was so aweful, I just kept telling crying and saying no I cant, i cant take it with me i cant i cant. My boyfriend heard me and came in, crying, I just kept saying to”please please go Nathen, just go please” It was bad enough I had to see it, I didnt want him to, The dr told me I either needed to get on the bed, or I needed to push the placenta out, so I pushed it out, there was so much blood. God it was aweful. The dr.’s keep telling me they dont know what was wrong, sometimes it just happens, which isnt very reasuring. I know this sounds stupid but that was the worse thing thats ever happened to me, I feel scarred. Its been almost a month and I havent gone a day without crying. My boyfriend doesnt make it any better, He gets mad at me for being sad, and shutting myself off, and threatens to leave me, it hurts so bad though, still. I just want a baby. Im sorry this has been so long, I havent told anyone what happend, besides my boyfriend. I just wish I knew what I did wrong, i feel aweful, i just want to feel normal again. ive been put on anti-depressants so hopefully those will kick in pretty soon.

  Qon wrote @ December 16, 2010 at 10:44 am

Hello, my name is Qon and I just found out yesterday that my best friend miscarried her baby.She was induced at 28 weeks, but she did not know she was pregnant. Unfortunately she had no signs and she is a very active person because of her job as a firefighter. When she went to the e.r because of stomach cramps that’s when she discovered she was pregnant, and without any amniotic fluid. The next day she was induced and delivered a very tiny stillborn baby girl.When I got the news I was devistated but I have to be strong for her. When I got to the hospital she was in I.C.U and very week. She is doing better now but there are a lot of unanswered questions! The main one is how long has the baby been deceased without any amniotic fluid? Where did the amniotic fluid go? Because she doesn’t recall ever leaking and she has had two live births which means she knows signs and symptoms. She has spoken to me about all of this but I just want to help her with a little closure without being frightening because she wants to know

  esi harrison wrote @ December 28, 2010 at 3:48 am

i have a friend who is married for six years now .she had her first child successfully but has later had seves continous miscarriages.what might have been the problem.

  Stacy wrote @ January 5, 2011 at 5:08 pm

Hello, today I’m trying to feel better. But I don’t. This is the fifth time my husband and I have miscarried. We can get pregnant; we just can’t continue the pregnancy beyond 6 to 8 weeks. As I type this, I’m ‘waiting’ for my body to naturally miscarry. Last week the ultrasound showed us the pregnancy as non-viable. I feel really badly. I know that I have a supportive husband and I know that my emotions may be a little nuts right now. But it just doesn’t get easier. We are healthy people. However, this time I was taking baby aspirin and daily Heparin shots. Can I do this again? I don’t know. I said that last time. Here I am, again. But I really wish for it to happen — everyone else (besides us here, that is) make it look easy.

  Granite Tiles wrote @ January 25, 2011 at 12:14 am

,:* I am very thankful to this topic because it really gives up to date information ‘.`

  Mel wrote @ February 17, 2011 at 1:10 am

I had a missed miscarriage at week 8. Feeling lost and down and also not knowing how to go about it, I came across this website and it has been very helpful.

  sharad wrote @ February 22, 2011 at 11:00 am

hii,i had 7 miscarriages all r between 3-5 months. evry time all things r normal but brfor m/c i will get rupture of memranes n baby will cme out like delivery. we had done all the test like apa,chromsomal typing ,amniocentesis of foetus,etc. all r normal. if anyone can suggest pls give
thanks

  Eve wrote @ February 25, 2011 at 2:57 am

hi, i know exactly how so many of these woman feel,got married in 2000,tryin for a baby,2003 had a ectopic pregnancy,2009 fell pregnant only got to know in feb of 2010 i was preg, was already 3 mnths,i was so xcited,every mnth we go for check ups bby was fine,then the surprise baby shower en all the gifs and all stuff on the list was bought and the crib was set up just the bby to cum now ,my water broke i was stil xcited no labour pains,thought the day was here,bby was goin to cum,then 3 hours went by still no pain, went to my doctor only to find out that there was no heart beat i was deverstated.i had a stillborn baby at around 37wks.my bby was now gone with all of my hopes, dreams and plans for her being in our lives.i was dignosed with pcos.

  Natasha wrote @ March 4, 2011 at 11:13 pm

I just miscarried. My whole world turned upside down. I feel like it a horrible nightmare. I feel like here but not here. I need 2 stop crying so I can take care of my 3 yr old. I feel like I need 2 scream.

  Kay wrote @ March 8, 2011 at 12:34 pm

I have just gone through a silent miscarriage. Went for an ultrasound last week where I should of been around 13 weeks and found out my baby has passed away at 10 weeks. The sad thing about this is that at 9 weeks I have an ultrasound, there was a heartbeat and it was so strong, also I saw my baby move a little. I am naturally very upset and can’t understand why this has happened. I am 33 and this would of been my first baby. I can only take comfort in knowing that I am not on my own and that this is something women are facing every day. The only way I can get through this is to have hope and not get down. I am going to give it a couple of months then start trying, I really hope that one day I will have a beautiful healthy baby to hold in my arms, love and best wishes to everyone that is or has gone through this xx

  Brandy wrote @ March 13, 2011 at 1:44 pm

I’am 26 and Just had my first m/c last Monday. This preganacy was my first and a surprise. I just started to get excited and started telling family and friends. I was between 7-8weeks and started bleeding at work. I had no pain at ,then started having some cramping. I went for a sono the next day and it was confirmed, I had lost the baby. The sono tech said there was’nt much left in my uterus. It’s been an emotional roller coaster. First scared that I was pregnant and not ready, then scared cause I was bleeding and then terrified and so sad to find out I had lost it. All I can think about is getting pregnant again. I know I just need to trust in God and except things. I’am just scared this will happen again. I feel better knowing that I’am not alone. I pray for you guys and know that your not alone.

  zy wrote @ March 28, 2011 at 7:34 am

hey, i do all have the symptoms about being pregnant, but im just soooo much worried, i dont wanna dissappoint my parents, i know its a SIN of miscarryng a baby, im so depressed. i have done 2 PT already and all r positive, :( i know i should be happy about it, but it seems like the situation worsened, i do have the symptoms of a stomach “cancer” yellowing of eyes, vomit wat u have just eaten . i dont know wat to do. its like everything is not going well. im afraid of my situation right now, im afraid to consult a doctor, and frankly speaking im loosing up my weight, everybody does notice it. i dont even want to eat. i do have the neck pain, :( we tried to miscarry this baby, we did wat we can do, but nothing happened, the only thing happened is that my stomach is in pain like almost everyday. neck pain every day also and vomitting, everyday, .. my classmates do tell me my eyes wre already yellow and im loosing my weight so fast.. can anyone help me about it..

  georgina wrote @ March 31, 2011 at 7:44 am

i discovered my pregnancy when i was 7 weeks. a week after i started bleeding, i was admitted and the ultrasound could not track the heartbeats and i stayed at hospital for a closer supervision as the doctors suspected it was a blighted ovum or early pregnanncy, after a week i had the had a scan again, the beats were there, i was released and came back after a week ( 03 march 2011) and i was told my baby is fine and its growing very well. the hands and feets were growing quite well. three days after the scan i felt like i had a bigger bubble filled with the water that was shaking when i try to walk. i felt the bubble bursting and the next minute i was covered with blood. i went back to hospital, they jst put a finger in my vagina and the baby came out together with blood. my heart is so broken. nobody told me what could have caused the miscarriage

  Ricketta Williams wrote @ April 20, 2011 at 4:49 pm

Hi I have seen a lot of issue that im having on here so im very nevous about my situation my period was like 2 days late and i only spotted when it did come on and then it went off but now its on like I have a regular period and I took a home pregnacy test it was positive so i went 2 the dr. that one was positive but that same night i started bleeding like my period was on bright red but i took an exam and my cervix was still closed just worried about the bleeding cuz i heard its possible 4 u 2 have a period while u r pregnant and they carry the baby full term without any complecations i got some blood work done 2day and get the results tomorrow but before i started the spotting my stomache was hurting like i had gas or a uti but it hasnt cramped like that since i have a 4 year old and never did bleed with him im hoping 4 a good outcome and it be ok but im a lil worried cuz i was lookin foward 2 pregnacy again and the excitement

  Erin wrote @ April 22, 2011 at 10:22 am

Hi, I’m 32yrs and had a misscarriage 2wks ago. I was going to be 16wks when I had the D/C. Our firs pregnancy we misscarried, but it was earlier and a baby had never formed. On my last ultrasound, my baby had a strong heartbeat, arms and legs and was developing wonderfully. I couldn’t wait to find our what our precious baby was going to be. We have two sons, 6yrs and 20 mths. This has been the hardest thing I’ve ever been through. After the D/C I had the same feelings as after I had my boys. I wanted to hold my baby terribly bad. I just couldn’t accept that I was no longer pregnant, but didn’t have a baby. My arms felt so empty. When I lay down at night I can hear it’s little heartbeat. The only comfort I have is to know I will see my baby one day in Heaven! This is the only thing I can share with you who can’t seem to find any comfort. I’m still having a very difficult time, not sleeping much at night, but I try to focus on the future. As bad as I want to hold another baby, I just can’t go through this again. Those of you who have been through this numerous times, my heart goes out to you! I thank God everyday for the boys he has given me. My goal now, is to raise and love these boys, and make sure we live a wonderful Christian life so one day we will hold our sweet baby!!!!

  kelly wrote @ May 20, 2011 at 7:58 pm

Hi I’m 6 weeks and 1 day pregnant. I already have a 6 year old daughter and my pregnancy with her went fine. When I went to the doctor I found out I was 5 weeks and 2 days pregnant and a week later the doctors have already done 2 quant test on me and they are saying that my level has dropped 24 points in 48 hours:( they said i’m gonna miscarry. Is there anyway possible for me not to miscarry? Is there anyway possible that i can carry this baby to full term? I don’t want to give up. If something was wrong shouldn’t the doctor have seen it when he done my sonogram when i found out i was pregnant at 5 weeks and 2 days? Wouldn’t he have known then?

  Emelda wrote @ June 30, 2011 at 4:48 am

Hi i was ur stories, i had same problem. I miscarried 6 times in a row with no reason. I know what u ladies r going thru, all i can say is dont loose hope, have faith. I dont have a child and i know 1 day GOD will give me a child. Its so sad what we go throught especially if they cant find the reason why.I pray that GOD answer my prayers 1day,,,lets be strong ladies

  shawna wrote @ September 14, 2011 at 4:16 am

Hi everyone I have had one. Miscarriage I know that’s not much but I know how u ladies feel but please don’t give up cuz ur day will come I promise I had my miscarriage when I was sixteen ya I know that’s young but I am now eighteen and 25 weeks and 2 days pregnant with a beautiful healthy baby girl and if is what I did. To stay pregnant is I put myself on bedrest I know it sounds stupid but I feel like it helped cuz I was so scared of having another miscarriage and I didn’t want to go threw that again well good luck ladies I give u my best wishes

  keya wrote @ October 27, 2011 at 10:42 pm

Hey everyone I read all of your stories and I really do feel 4 all of you…my story is a lil diffrent…I’m 27 weeks & I been haveing mixed feelings about haveing this baby..I really don’t want to have it I think its just going to ruin my life even more …with reading all of your stories I wish I was in y’all shoes….I’m not being mean or hateful I don’t think that I’m ready for all of this but I been doing everything that I shouldn’t in this pregnancy except drinking & smokeing..I don’t have anybody to talk to about it b/c then there going to think I’m a mean person…I really am a nice person just not ready 4 all of this…..please somebody tell me whut I should do???

  Arianna wrote @ November 9, 2011 at 1:59 am

Hi there im about 4 and a half months pregnant, and im still having lots of difficulty with eating, even when im hungry its sooo hard to eat anything i feel like everything is going to make me throw up (usually does) so im left with an empty and painful stomach im very very concerned about my baby and their developpement im scared that im hurting him but theres nothing i can do about, do u have any helpful tips?
thank you,
Arianna

  abby wrote @ November 21, 2011 at 4:00 am

hi evryone! im abby from philippines im really sad ryt now because of ol the bad things happening with me year 2003 i gave birth to a beautiful baby after 3yrs 2006 i got pregnant fullterm and after i gave birth my baby died cordcoil but before i went to operating room the nurse chk d heartbeat of my baby and she was ok 3days b4 dey told me dat i loss d baby bec.dey wer so worrid abt me it was a cesarian.i dnt understnd myself its very healthy den it just died d pathologst told us dat d baby was dead overnyt already its very hard to beliv coz i still feel dat she’s alive and kicking me so after dat year its very hard for me to recover im always sad i dont talk i strting hating myself blaming my husband evrything fall apart .yr 2009 i got pregnant agen i dont knw wat will i feel coz of d trauma of experiencing my 2nd baby died so i just pray dat dis one will be ok after 5wweeks der is no heartbeat im strting to cry and cry and cry…. so,i experience dis time d miscariage it was so so so painful i canot forget d pain now my life is so disaster i do things dat r bad i made myself to be a different person bec i cannot acept d 2 loses until now im still searching for answers if dey wer alive i am the most happiest and perfect mother to them i will love them ..pls.sumbody give me a reply i just need a sumbody ryt now pleaseee…. let me understnd evrything.

  michelle wrote @ November 23, 2011 at 3:39 pm

here is my story may 5th 2011 was my first day of my period i did not have a period for over 17 weeks so i went to a specialist to have blood work done on the 8th of august. he was wondering cause all my child bearing life i was told i have PCOS but did not have none of the symptoms. so he checked my thyroid, my ovulation, to see if i really have PCOS,come to find out everything was normal i ovulate normally, NO PCOS at all. no thyroid issue at all everything was normal.now on September 8th 2011 was the first day of my period normal as always. i have not seen my period yet and today is November 89th 2 week ago another doctor did my blood work and it said negative a level <2. i have all pregnancy symptoms that im suppose to have in the correct stages of pregnancy for some reason is there a chance that its a lab error. my past history is molar pregnancy in 2001, son born in 2009 c-section, a few months later lost twins at 5 weeks January 30,2010 worst pain in my life. then in jun 2010 another molar pregnancy. what can wrong should i get another blood test done. i just got out the shower and for some reason i had a sharp pain in my lower abdomen and cervix im 10 weeks 2 days late today from my period im not sure if im pregnant or not but i dont have an appointment until dec 2nd ANY ADVICE PLEASE…..

  Corinna wrote @ December 1, 2011 at 1:52 am

I recently lost my baby , i was 9 weeks along . I had a Missed misscarege and had to have a D&C done . I saw my OBGYN yesterday for a follow up and he said the loss was most likley a chromosomal problem . ( they found extra tissue when they did the D&C ) and that the chances of me having a second misscarege are extreamly low . But he will not know for sure for a nother 3 weeks . ( the testing on the baby takes about 3 weeks to complete ) This has been the hardest thing i have ever goen trough … im so scared i wont get to ever be a mommy

  Vicky wrote @ December 10, 2011 at 3:32 am

I’ve just had my second m/c both were at 10 weeks, first was Christmas day last year and this one my youngest son 3rd birthday. I already have 3 beautiful children which I carried to term with no problems and now 2 miscarriages in a year. People say at least I have children And that is a comfort, but it also means i know what I have lost. I look at my children and wonder if it would of looked like them. It’s torture.

  vivie wrote @ December 27, 2011 at 12:28 pm

i’m so glad that i have found this website. i have had my natural m/c 5days before Christmas. i have expected the worst because during my ultrasound i couldn’t see my baby only the sac (i was about 10 weeks). the doctor gave me two weeks before my next review to see if the baby is there or not but just a week later i started to see some spotting. it was not much but i started to worry. the spotting didn’t stop and continued for five days. i didn’t experience any pain but on that fifth day i decided to visit the doctor and have an early check-up.

She said it might be a sign of a m/c but just to be sure she did another ultrasound and it was still the same, we couldn’t see the baby. She gave a choice whether to wait for a natural m/c or go for D&C. I went for natural m/c, still hoping that i can save my pregnancy. The next day I started to have terrible cramps with little bleeding. By 4 i was in the e.r, i can feel the clot coming out but far from over. It was not until 5.30pm did the doctor examine me and took out the sac. I didn’t went for D&C but it was painful and frightening since i was awake.

I am glad my husband was being very supportive and helped me. I know he is feeling sad just as i am but i am sure nothing is impossible as long as we keep our trust in Jesus. To all mothers out there who had experienced the same thing keep on giving your support, it really help knowing that we are not alone. God Bless All.

  Ro wrote @ January 2, 2012 at 1:35 am

Hello everyone,
I am 30 and on the 26th of December I had a miscarriage at 14 weeks and 3 days at home. This was my 4th one and the farthest I have ever gotten and he was a tiny little boy. I understand everyone’s fears cause I have the same ones and I really wonder if it will happen for me. I really like this site and hearing everyone’s stories make me feel like I am not alone in this. I am going to do all of the very expensive testing and I believe in my heart I will be 100% normal. I have made the decision to arm myself with knowledge so that when I do go for the testing and have more babies I will not be ignorant to the information that is going to be given to me. I have also made a promise to myself that I will find a Dr. That is going to be aggressive and make sure that I will be heard. Please ladies let’s continue to be encouraging and report our progress whether it is success or set back. I love the site and thank you for this creation.

  mariz wrote @ January 19, 2012 at 10:06 pm

can anyone tell me why do cord accidents happen? i have 2 m/c with the same problem 1st my baby is almost 5 months old and the cord choke my baby because the cord coil in my baby’s neck this second im 24 weeks pregnant and the cord coiled again near my baby’s belly button so the blood did not flow through what seems to be the problem? is it me? or the next i will get pregnant i should be put to bedrest? its so so sad because i got 2 m/c in just 1 yr. please help..i pray GOD will give me a chance to have a baby.

  wrote @ February 7, 2012 at 7:46 pm

Hi there, I’m so sorry to hear all the miscarriages people have been through, it is really a devistating thing to have happen to anyone.

I didn’t know I was pregnant then the hospital told me I had miscarried. I’m just worried that because I’ve had one that it will happen again.

I feel like I’m ready to try again although that horrible thought of miscarriage will always be in the back of my mind. The hospital said it was nothing I had done wrong that it just wasn’t the right time and these things happen. Should I just keep living life thinking that next time everything will go to plan?

I feel like I’m ready to be a mum but is it too early to even think about it as I had the miscarriage about 2/3 months ago?
.. Any answers would be great to put my mind at rest! X

  Ashley wrote @ February 12, 2012 at 12:22 pm

So I have had 6 m/c I have been thinkinking if me and my husband should try again or not. I know I am meant to be a mother. I have always wanted to have kids and so does my husband. I am so scared to try again cause I have that fear of losing the baby, but at the same time I want to keep trying and trying until we have a baby. I always told myself to never give up on hope, that I have faith in having a healthy baby, but lately I have been thinking about all of my babies that I had lost, and started to wonder,if I will ever have children. Any advice or any thoughts I would appreciate it. Thankyou for listening, and God Bless You.

  Leila wrote @ February 28, 2012 at 7:32 pm

I recently got married late last year and decided to get off the pill in the middle of December. My husband and I were open to the likelihood of having a baby but we didn’t really expect it would happen straight away. I began to feel pregnant around late January. My husband didn’t think I could get pregnant that quick. I took a pregnancy test on the 30th January 2012 and it was negative. I still believed I was pregnant. I took another pregnancy test on the 11th February and it was positive. I was so happy and finally my husband could believe it. Then at work on February 15, I noticed some bleeding when I went to the bathroom. My heart sank. Went home straight away to see a doctor. Cried all the way there because I felt in my heart and mind that I was losing the baby. I did a urine test at the Doctor’s and it was negative. I had an ultrasound and they couldn’t see anything. Maybe I wasn’t pregnant after all?? I was still bleeding but not enough to fill a pad. Everytime I peed, stringy blood would come out. I noticed a clot on my pad the next morning. I started the blood tests. The first blood test came out positive but my hcg was too low so they said I will likely miscarry. I had another blood test in 2 days. The result was that my hcg level dropped from 19 to 4. Devastated. I had kept a journal from the moment I suspected I was pregnant until the day the miscarriage was confirmed. It’s so hard to deal with but I am slowly starting to get back on my feet. One day at a time. It’s only when friend’s announce their pregnancy at the same time as I would have been and when people ask us “are you pregnant yet?” that it gets so upsetting. All I can do is put on a brave face and say ‘not yet’. It’s such a private and silent thing to go through but God sees our tears and hearts and he holds our babies ever so dearly in his arms. They are loved and treasured in heaven. Let’s all stay strong and know that getting pregnant is life’s most mysterious miracle. Yes, our miracles were shortlived but it was still a miracle and the mystery of our miscarriages teaches us that our hearts can’t grasp the full complexities of life because it is so unique and beyond our seeing, feeling and knowing. So let’s keep it simple. One day at a time and don’t ever ever lose hope. God bless us all.

  Veve wrote @ March 1, 2012 at 7:45 am

I found out about our miscarriage at our 12 week scan. It was horrible..i remember thinking why it was taking the technician so long to find our baby. When she said there was no heartbeat, my heart broke.. I couldnt speak..i didnt even cry..it was just too surreal.. For the past 6 weeks i had been suffering from morning sickness,fatigue and my breast were soo sore..how could this woman now tell me it wasnt a viable pregnancy??!! The docs did confirm that i miscarried..and i had a d&c on the 29th of feb.. Its a lie when they say ‘the sicker u r the healthier ur baby’..nothing is ever forsure..i have now lost 3 babies..but am so thankful for my little healthy man who is now 2 and a half..he keeps me strong and i know God will bless me with another healthy baby..i just have to be patient and believe that it will happen. I have read through all the experiences shared on this website and my heart goes out to you all that have lost precious angels. Be strong and dont lose hope.

  sentarra wrote @ March 1, 2012 at 6:52 pm

I had a bad dream that M/C. Then I lost weight and started ti crap then spot. The doc said baby stop growning at 8 1/2 weeks . That was the same week and of my bad dream. At my 12a week appointment. They did a D&C on me. Im still in so much pain even with the pain meads. Its only been 3 days buy when will it get easier. It hurts so much I can’t even pick up my 2 year old. Alli want to do is hold him and thank god I have one healthy boy

  kate wrote @ April 5, 2012 at 4:58 am

Hi I am 47 and found out I was pregnant on 14/3 My husband and I were so happy, we had never given up hope that we would have another child. (we have two 11 and 6). Two tests and a test with do all positive, I had usual symtoms but no sickness. Then on sun, Ap fools I started bleeding. Went to EPC and a scan showed nothing, no sac, but the test showed raised levels of Hcg now I have to wait for a week to see if levels keep rising and if a sac appears in case my dates were wrong. I have bleed since sunday, sometimes it stops for a while, I passed some big clots but the hosp said it wasnt fetal tissue and that my lining is still thickened so there is still a chance. I dont think I can face another scan showing nothing and watching this small smigeon of hope being whisked away. I didnt realise how much I really wanted another baby until this happened. I cant believe that God would be so cruel as to let this happen and then whisk it away again. I havent had any pain but \i do feel very light headed this morning. \i have been resting and trying to take it easy; Do you think there is really any hope for this wee one?

  Sherine wrote @ April 26, 2012 at 5:13 am

It feels so good to after reading this website. I was thinking all these years that I was the only one faced with this problem. But all women has gone through at least 1 m/c in their lives.

I have gone through 09 m/c. And I still don’t have a healthy child yet. It is so depressing and sad. Being the only child in the family, it is even nore upsetting. Sometime even friends don’t understand what you are going through, if they have not faced the same situation.

With all my 9 m/c, the doctor said nothing is really wrong with me. But I am unable to carry the baby more than 12 weeks. Between the 6 -8 weeks the heartbeat stops. The dr says since this is happening within the 12 weeks, it is due to natual causes and nothing can be done about it. All relevant tests were done on me. But everything seems to be negative and normal. So All what I can do is, wait for the right moment and pray. Because God knows best and the correct time. All the best to all of you and keep praying. Don’t ever give up hopes. All the best.

  Danica wrote @ May 4, 2012 at 10:53 am

Hi, Im 27 and have had 3 m/c but i also have 2 beautiful children.
I m/c at 13wks with my first, then went to term with my daughter, had my son at 25 wks and since him 2 m/c. my dr is looking into uterine auto immune disease. but im struggeling to find info. this site helped lots. the fact i had a prem plus 2 m/c in a row seems to fit the profile, but now it makes me question trying again for our 3rd child, which i desperately want. How do i know when to let it be?? Im greatful every day for the children i have but dont quite feel compete. am i being selfish??

  mama mo wrote @ May 11, 2012 at 9:31 am

check your thyroid . its the hidden cause of miscarriage ..

  July wrote @ July 23, 2012 at 9:42 pm

Any advice on this situation would be most appreciated. I recently found out I am newly pregnant. I called my mother and was planning to call my sister, but my mother told me she had just suffered a miscarriage at 10 weeks after a previous one at 6 weeks (and I wasn’t supposed to know). Now I’m thinking maybe I should hold off on telling my sister for a while. Is that the right thing to do even though I would have told her if I hadn’t known (and am not supposed to know)?

  Sydnye wrote @ August 1, 2012 at 7:46 pm

Hello,

I found out I was pregnant when I was 2months along. It was unexpected and I was scared and not ready. Though I knew in the months to come I would prepare myself with the support of my boyfriend and my family which I had and I felt blessed. With this being my first pregnancy at age 21 I was nervous and of-course kept praying to G-d to let me have a healthy baby and pregnancy. I relocated to be closer to my parents and everything seemed fine. On July 23-2012 , I heard my baby’s strong and healthy heartbeat. The doctors said it sounds great and we planned a ultrasound on Wed 25-2012. Everything seemed fine. I felt fine. Nothing out of the normal happened to me . I went to the ultrasound and it showed that my baby which was 16weeks had no visible heartbeat and that the amniotic fluid had decreased. The doctors don’t know why and are shocked why I lost the baby since I am healthy and had no cramping or bleeding what soever . I had D&C on Saturday 28-2012 to remove the baby and they will be running test to see if they can find any answers to why my baby passed away. I am so heart broken and what nothing else but to have my baby back but I know that is not going to happen and G-d has a plan. I crave to be pregnant again as soon as possible. I cant think of anything else. For so many reasons I want to be pregnant again to see if I can carry full term to have and hold my baby. Is that normal to feel and think like that? I know having a new baby will not replace my angel who I lost. I know I will be worrying about the future when I get pregnant again. When can I try again? I know the doctors kept telling me that I don’t need to worry about this ever happening again. That makes me not so sad but that doesn’t help me with the loss of my baby now. Things happen for a reason and when it is my turn It will happen I know that.

  shayla marquez wrote @ September 12, 2012 at 6:14 am

Im waiting to have my m/c that cant be stopped the docters say found out i was preg 16wks well now 17 and 3 days heave a heart beat ulrta sound looks good but i have been bleeding since the beging i was on lo lo estrin fe took it every day didnt know i was preg i also had chemo for a yr and was told to wait.Well i feel like im waiting for the worst thing ever when will my baby die my fluid began to leak monday passed a lg clot cant stop crying can hardly look at babys the father is married i didnt know another shady cop! this is like a bomb waiting to go off that will blow up my heart at the same timei hope babys do go to heaven if ur not married

  Sarina wrote @ October 6, 2012 at 9:24 pm

I had my 1st m/c yesterday at 9 weeks. I was told by the doctor that my hcg level was showing me only 2 to 4 weeks so I assume that the baby was gone for awhile. I cried at first but as the day progressed I realized that it just wasn’t meant to be. Sometimes in life things happen for a reason we can choose to dwell on it and be sad and hide away or we can accept it for what it is and move on. I truly believe that it happened for a reason so I am going to move on.

  Ellie wrote @ February 11, 2013 at 1:15 pm

Thank you for writing this so sensitively, This is the first time i have read an article that refferred to them as babies, I appreciate that greatly, We have ad 6 MC, and have one daughter who is two, We are currently pregnant for the 8th time and are 15 weeks along.I was diagnosed with Lupus Anticoagulant and am taking ‘baby’ aspirin – 75mg and Clexane injections daily. I am scared to death but this is the furthest we have got since our daughter in 2010 and i wont give up hope yet

  Cindy wrote @ March 2, 2013 at 6:33 pm

Hi. I have suffered 5 m/c. 3 being very early and 2 being at 16 and 17 weeks. With my first late m/c, the baby had been gone for a while and the placenta and umbilical cord was deteriorating and with my 2nd late one, the cord was wrapped around his neck 4 times. I had all the genetic testing done to make sure there was nothing else wrong with them and all testing was perfect. My last loss was in October of last year. I am now wanting to try again, but am terrified of what could happen. I already have 4 healthy children. The older 3 being from a previous marriage. My 4th child is with my current husband. I am happy to read that some on here have gone on to have healthy babies after such horrible losses. It gives me hope!

  Laura wrote @ April 10, 2013 at 7:59 am

I found this website after suffering my 2nd miscarriage in 3 months (after 5 healthy pregnancies). I was quite concerned to read that your first period should be at least 20 days after the bleeding from the miscarriage has ended. I stopped bleeding from my first miscarriage on January 7 and started my next period January 24. I conceived again during my next cycle in February and lost that baby to miscarriage at the end of March. Now I wonder if possibly my early return to cycles in January indicated a hormonal problem that affected the next baby. The doctor drew my progesterone levels both time which were in the normal range.

  Kasey wrote @ July 3, 2013 at 8:11 am

I had my first miscarriage at 9 weeks on June 4, 2013. My husband and I went to our first ulstra sound that day and found that there was no baby. It had not progressed past 4/5 weeks. I chose to take cytotec to get the miscarriage process started as I didn’t think I could handle waiting for it to start naturally. I am now waiting for AF to arrive so that we can start trying again. I found the link to this website from a community boad on babycenter. I found it yesterday and have already read your sperm meets egg and Babydust books. Both were great but I found so much comfort from reading Babydust. Thanks so much!!

  Jamie wrote @ August 13, 2013 at 10:07 am

I found this site after searching for answers as to why I have lost another pregnancy. My husband and I were married in 2008 and we were so excited to find out we were pregnant two months later. I had a wonderful pregnancy, no complications, no spotting, no worries. I went past my due date and had to be induced. About 9 months after his birth we found out we were pregnant again. This pregnancy lasted only 5 weeks. The dr was convinced it was just an isolated incident so we tried again. The next pregnancy lasted only 6 weeks. The dr ran some tests and found out I had MTHFR and Thrombophelia. So my next pregnancy I would need Heparin, baby aspirin and Folbic. I got pregnant again and after doing all of the things I thought I should be doing we m/c at 6 weeks. I had to know more so we went to see a maternal fetal specialist and he didn’t have many answers other than it was a blighted ovum. So reluctantly we tried again and we were slightly terrified to find we were pregnant again. Expecting the same we waited for the bleeding to start and when it did I was not even sad, I expected it! I had heard of a dr in the area who might be able to help us. We went to him and found out my husband has chromosome issues and that could be the reason these pregnancies could not get past 7 wks. About two years after my last m/c my endocrinologist discovered I would need thyroid meds to help bring me up to normal level. He also said since we were having trouble conceiving and that was not normal this might help. I was on the meds for two months when I found out we were pregnant again. We were shocked and overjoyed, we thought our journey was over and we would be parents of one amazing little boy! I had my first u/s and we saw a heartbeat. We were over the moon excited! We went the following week to hear it and found out it has slowed and so we couldn’t hear it. I still had hope since I had no spotting. We just found out yesterday the heartbeat is gone and I may have to have a d&c. We are completely devastated and don’t know where to go from here! Please help!

  Esther wrote @ September 20, 2013 at 5:24 am

I have had 3 miscarriages in total, one at 6 weeks about 7 years ago, one last year at 19 weeks and one just over a week ago at 15 weeks. One thing that is really hard is that when you say you have had a misscarriage people assume you have lost the baby early and although sad at least it happened early but with later misscarriages they dont realise you have to give birth to your baby, which is a much more emotional thing as you get to ‘meet’ your baby and have a funeral. the term ‘early stillbirth’ should be used to help people understand how much further on you were and you have to have the baby etc etc. This said, I am NOT saying at all that early misscarriages dont mean anything, i’ve had one so i do understand but there is a marked difference in how people deal with you as to how to say whats happened. Not sure if any of that made sense!

  Jackie wrote @ October 31, 2013 at 4:34 pm

I lost my baby two days ago. This was my first pregnancy.I was five weeks and four days along. I found out on Monday I was pregnant and lost it on Tuesday. To say im devastated is an understatement. People keep saying its not my fault but I have myself convinced that it is. Im so afraid to try again. I dont know what to do with myself.

  JENI wrote @ November 15, 2013 at 8:24 am

Hello there, my name is Jeni and I have had three successful pregnancies resulting in four beautiful children. I am 26. With my daughter, last healthy pregnancy I had a C-Section. Sense then I have had three MC, lost one at 6 weeks then 13 weeks and now this time I need to go in and have labor induced today. I am 20 weeks and found yesturday there is no heart beat. Baby wasn’t moving either on US. Right now I can’t imagine going through this again. I thought after 16 weeks we were in the clear. All four of my children were with me at the clinic for the ultra sound. Thank God for the staff as they were so wonderful to them. However now I fear all the hormones raging inside afterwards. I have always had post partum. I might also add friends I see weekly there are like 7 of them all due within 6 weeks of eachother. Will I be able to face them and be happy for them? Nervous, as to what will be after I hold my little angel. Will I be able to let go? Do I try again, give myself a good 6 months to a year before trying… I don’t understand this, all I know is God is in control and my babies are now in his arms. Yet the pain of not seeing them or watching them grow in this earth is so heart wrenching… I am so sorry to all of you who have had losses. There are no words to express the pain and heartache any of US have been through. God bless you all and your families.

  massom wrote @ December 29, 2013 at 4:09 pm

I am 37 .and I had 4 miscarriages in last 2 yesrs with no duccessful pregnancy.my husban d a nd I want a healthy baby badly .l am so so so worried that I never have my own child .any helping story…

  ijay wrote @ January 9, 2014 at 4:09 pm

i have had 2 m/c in 1year the first at 19weeks and 3days with my water breaking and the 2nd i had a cervical cerlage and at 17weeks my water broke again and was rushed to the hospital where i was placed on antibiotics and after 3weeks i had a cord prolapsed even with all the bed rest i had and lot of drinking of water due to water breaking. pls am so scared and don’t know what to do due to the constant pprom and due to that i dont know if it will still happen again, advice me on what to do am in desperate need to solve these situation

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