Grandparents and Grief after a Miscarriage or Stillbirth

Yesterday at a support group meeting by the fabulous Face2Face Austin, one of the local groups started by Faces of Loss, Faces of Hope, we talked about how our parents handled the loss of their grandbabies. Especially sensitive is the discussion of “first” grandbabies and of other family members having babies during this difficult time.

Certainly among us, the grandparents handled things differently, running the gamut from overwhelming grief that impacted their lives significantly, to trying to pass off the loss as unimportant, sometimes with those horrid phrases we hate to hear, “It was God’s Will” or “It will happen when it’s meant to be.”

We wondered what resources were out there for grandparents. I did a fairly exhaustive search this morning, trying to come up with things.

Probably the most direct was at Mothers in Sympathy and Support, a long-standing organization dedicated to helping families recover after a loss. They have a page and a forum dedicated to grandparents:

http://missfoundation.org/family/grandparents.html

Sands has a pamphlet they will send out: http://www.sandsqld.com/booklets.html 

There were several articles:

http://www.grandparents.com/gp/content/expert-advice/family-matters/article/mending-a-broken-heart.html

http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art54923.asp

And a couple independent books:

Forgotten Tears: A Grandmother’s Journey Through Grief

For Bereaved Grandparents

I’ll take some time to consider what I might could add to the resources available. It does seem rather thin. If you have ideas, let me know–send your parents over here to give me ideas, and we’ll make them happen.



3 thoughts on “Grandparents and Grief after a Miscarriage or Stillbirth

  1. I stumbled on your website as i am going through a grandma’s grief. My husband has stage 4 cancer so I had thought this would bring some happiness into my life. Probably not the best reason, but still.
    Now it is not to be. It is such a nameless grief.

  2. Mu son and his wife went through preparation, fertility treatments, etc. on Oder to have their first child. We were so happy for them when we found out they were not only expecting, but expecting triplets! In her second trimester she delivered a little boy, on Christmas morning, who lived for a very brief time. Several weeks later her water again broke and she delivered the two girls who also passed. The babies looked perfect just tiny. They only needed more time to grow. Both families held and kissed Sjames, Brianna and Mikayla and will always remember these dear little angels. My son and his wife and families are grieving while at the same time waiting for another son and his wife to deliver their second child in March. I am so conflicted. How can I help them through this while fussing over the newest addition?

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