DeannaI know this week is bittersweet for many of us. You’re here because at least one of your sweet babies didn’t make it into your arms.
Mother’s Day is forever a mixed blessing for me. My first one, just two weeks after losing Casey at 20 weeks gestation, was so terrible I have blotted it from my memory. And even now, 14 years later, I still feel the pull of emotions in both directions as I think of the babies I lost (Casey, Daniel, Emma) and the ones that I got to keep (Emily, Elizabeth), and now, the one we’re trying for (our friends call him Thor even though he doesn’t exist yet…)
I want each of you to remember that whether that baby is in your belly, in your arms, or in the sky—you’re still a mother. It doesn’t matter who recognizes it or who doesn’t—your baby most certainly does.
I’m kicking off a week of give aways! You can comment here or on the Facebook page for chances to win! Feel free to comment both places—I’ll be giving away items both here and at A Place for Our Angels.
The first give away is a new book of poetry about infertility, pregnancy, and loss that came out just a few weeks ago by Nicole Breit, called “I Can Make Life.” This collection was a finalist in the Mary Ballard Poetry Chapbook Prize this year.
Check it out below, or if that’s too small on your browser, click through to check it out bigger here!
All the mothers who win any of the give aways over the next few days will be notified on Mother’s Day this Sunday (if I remember! If not, on Monday.)
Amazing…
You have such a way with words Deanna, after 3 losses, the last being 6 years ago and no surviving children, nobody acknowledges me on Mothers Day. To them, I have no children, so I therefore do not count. My own mother has passed away and so I focus on my lovely memories of her on that day rather than my sorrows. But your paragraph that states that the babies recognise the date is such a lovely thought. In UK our Mothers Day was officially in March. Thank you so much for always being there for those that have been touched by loss x x
This looks like a soothing, peaceful read – at least from the cover imagery – something to read on a night when I feel like reflecting.
This looks like a peaceful reading, would love to win this 🙂
Deanna, thank you for always helping me & others with our struggles. To all 6 of my little ones, 3 Angels & 3 with me Mommy loves you!!!!
Thanks for your always encouraging words Deanna. This Mother’s Day I celebrate one baby here in my arms and five sweet ones in heaven. Mother’s Day is such a bittersweet day for me. So thankful for my one miracle and yet still so sad about all the others and feelings of guilt for not just being happy with the one blessing I have been given. Baby number four would have been born right about now. Not giving up though…our hearts tell us to keep the up the fight for another one. Thank you so much. Happy Mother’s Day to all the mother’s out there, both those who get to hold their babies and those who do not.
Deanna, Mother’s Day is the hardest day of the year for me. I have had 5 m/c’s and with no surviving children, I am always forgotten as a mother. It really hurts, it really does. I was thinking a lot about it this past year and decided to do special on Mother’s Day to honor my angel babies in some way, shape, or form. We are gonna do that this year and we have yet to finalize what exactly we are doing. However, this Mother’s Day is becoming bitterswweet as we just found out we are expecting again.
Hi..I’m sure I’m not posting this comment in the right place, but I’m in need of some answers if someone could help me. I think I may have had an early miscarriage last week.. I had what I thought was my period, except it was heavier than normal and on the third day of it, I passed a blood clot (?) about the size of my palm.It was a purplish/maroon color and felt squishy and jelly-like. i have never seen anything like it before and I dont normally get blood clots with my period.
I continued to bleed heavily for the next 7 days. I had more pain than I usually do too. I was overly emotional, with chills, dizziness, and just really really tired prior to this happening. Moreso than I usually am before my period. I never took a test because I just assumed what I was feeling was PMS just on a greater level than usual.
I am now still bloated, been exhausted(althogh getting better), having pain in my lower back and down my legs. This isn’t how I normally feel after my periid ends. I have an ultrasound scheduled nezt week to see about some pelvic pain thats going on.
Do you think this could have been a very early miscarriage?
Thank u for your help and let me say how sorry I am for all your losses. Praying for each of you!!
I found out I was pregnant with our 3rd child 5 days after my husband lost his job. Even though the timing wasn’t ideal we were excited because last July I was told my chances of getting pregnant were very slim. Ironically our baby was due Dec. 17th, the day my husband and I first met. Last Sunday, May 6th, we lost our baby…on my husbands birthday. I am at a loss for words except that my heart is so torn up inside.
Thank you for this website. It’s so hard having an angel, even on normal days. I’m pregnant again, and someone asked if my daughter is my only other child. I didn’t even know what to say. Yes? No? It’s complicated? Strangers aren’t even trying to be unkind, but it happens anyway.
I am grateful for having my mother and enjoy spoiling her on Mothers Day but I silently cry on Mothers Day and am too afraid to let my emotions show. I dearly long for the baby that was gone too soon. I long for the day that I will hold my sweet baby in my arms and shower him in kisses. It has been 5 years but the pain and sorrow is still rooted in my heart.
I lost my baby on March 2, 2012 after we had found out that she did not have bladder or kidneys. She was my first baby and we miss her much.
Congratulations, Jennifer, for winning the book! I’ll be in contact via email.